171 Ways to Avoid Jury Duty

Jury Sum­mons from Marin County Supe­rior Court to Me,

Report Date: Jan 29, 2010

How can you get out of jury duty?  More urgently, how can I get out of jury duty?

Let me count the ways:

• I asked Google how to get out of jury duty and its first page of search results returned arti­cles lay­ing out 74 ways.
• Then I asked Yahoo the same ques­tion, first page results: 38 ways.
• Bing, same ques­tion: 59 ways.

Add them up:  171 ways.   Who’s got time for 171 ways?  Not me – once I count past sev­en­teen I lose track and have to start over (hey!  that’s num­ber 172).

I’m going with the big three: 

1. Wear a beard. You might need to plan four or five months ahead of time – don’t worry, you can get a six month exten­sion over the phone or by e-mail).  Go for a full beard like one of these (L to R):  Lt. Gen (Old Pete) Longstreet CSA. Her­man Melville, John Muir – no sissy goatees).
2. Get edu­cated, list your col­lege degrees, prefer­ably with an advanced degree or two.
3. Dress for gar­den­ing.

 

Beyond the big three, I have no story and I’m stick­ing to it.

———

Pho­tos from Wikipedia.